Well, I finally did it. I managed to sit down and watch the Star Trek movie. You know what? It was HORRIBLE! Now, I’ve already gone on about three rants since watching this, so I’m going to attempt to remain civil on my blog. =P
I really hated what this movie did. I mean, all of it was painful. I don’t think they got a single actor right for the parts they were playing. The one beaming light of hope this entire movie had was Leonard Nimoy is still epic. They just didn’t behave properly. Everything from Kirk cheating at his test, to Spok having a love interest was just so completely wrong. To make matters even worse, this wanted to be an action movie, which is the exact opposite of what anything related to Star Trek should be! They summed up Star Trek better in the intro than anyone else could, Star Trek is about exploration, seeing something you never would have imagined and watching how fairly ordinary people deal with this strange situation.
So, ignoring that this was a Star Trek movie, how does it hold up as an Action flick? It’s terrible! Why? This is some of the worst directing I’ve seen in years. Constant shaky cam, even when it’s not some sort of action scene, half of the combat scenes had the actors heads cut off and the other half were cut so quickly you could hardly make out what was happening on screen, and the single most offensive thing this director did was add a @#$*#&$(@ lens flare EVERY 15 seconds. There is 1 scene in this entire movie that doesn’t have a lens flare in it, in every other one you literally can’t go 15 seconds without one (I counted). Do you know how distracting that is? Walking through a dark corridor, trying to pay attention to what’s going on and BLAM you can’t see half the screen because there’s a blue lens flare running across the entire screen, because every light in existence must blind the camera. To make matters worse, every shot of this movie outside of a ship (with the exception of a blizzard planet) is in perpetual twilight. I thought I was watching a Michael Bay movie (I seriously had to pause and check online, this was getting ridiculous).
When I have an Uwe Boll movie with better direction than you put into a movie, you really need to think about a different career.
*cough* And finally, how does it stack up as a Sci-fi movie? If you ignore everything related to Star Trek, and somehow look past the worst directing I’ve seen since the DBZ movie, it’s just generic. I mean, they didn’t do anything with it. The whole story can be summed up as, “Crazy alien wants to destroy most of teh universe!” (“teh” misspelled for dramatic effect) They didn’t actually change anything with this movie. Yes ***Spoilers***, Vulcan is owned and Kirk didn’t have a father, but at the end of this movie, Kirk and Spok are friends, the entire crew is on the Enterprise, and they’re all setting off to explore new life and new civilizations. ***End Spoiler*** That’s it, there was no reason to make this movie. They butchered the characters, ruined the very premise of Star Trek and all of it was for an unbelievably generic sci-fi plot that would barely make it into a made for TV movie. They didn’t even do anything bold with it like killing off characters that we know and love or making someone like Spok turn into the bad guy, just nothing.
Whew, now that all of that is said and done, it’s time to talk about the other movie I watched today, Zombieland. You know, I didn’t like the trailer for Zombieland, just didn’t seem like my kind of movie. But, a lot of people said it was pretty good, and it was free to stream it, so I figured I might as well. I really enjoyed it.
It has much better direction than the Star Trek movie, and I thought it did a great job of balancing humor and action. Is it a horror movie? No, but I don’t think all zombie movies have to be. It’s just a fun romp that doesn’t really lead anywhere and is making fun the traditional zombie movie. My favorite part? I loved the rules. I don’t know why, but I loved it every time one of those rules popped up on screen. =P
So, that was my excitement for today. I’d love to go on about other stuff, but it’s getting late and that word count box is saying this is around 800 words already. So, without further delay, I shall head off to bed. おやすみなさい！ =D